You Can’t Be Anxious NOW

That’s right…you can’t have anxiety NOW.

See, anxiety, by its very nature, can’t be a present moment activity.

Let’s look at it.  What is anxiety?  Well, the way I see it, anxiety is fear about what you think may happen.

But what it ISN’T is even more important.

Anxiety is never fear of what IS happening.

Let’s take an example.  If you’re walking through the woods and all of a sudden, a grizzly bear jumps out from behind the bushes and starts chasing you, that’s not anxiety, it’s FEAR.  (can bears even jump?  I’m not sure.)

But if you’re walking down that same path and you’re worried that a bear may be cleverly lurking in the bushes, that’s ANXIETY.

When something IS happening – and it’s REAL – that’s fear.

We want fear, it protects us when we’re in real danger.  It prepares our body to run away from that jumping bear on the trail, or to get out of a burning house, or to do whatever we need to in times of true crisis.

But when we’re IMAGINING something bad happening – and it ISN’T real – that’s anxiety.

We don’t need that.

It doesn’t protect us…because there’s nothing to protect us from.

It prepares us to run away…but there’s nothing to run from so we just feel the raw energy surging through our bodies and don’t know why it’s there.

It’s ok to let go of anxiety because anxiety and fear are two completely different things.  We can let go of anxiety and still keep the valuable fear around, so if something terrible does happen we have it.  But we don’t need to spend the weeks, months, or years in between experiences of true fear to be ruined with purposeless anxiety.

That’s the million dollar question isn’t it? How do we let go of anxiety?

Well, if anxiety is caused by our imagination of a possible future…then couldn’t we…

Focus less on our imaginary future and more on the real NOW?

Maybe it’s just me, but it sure seems like we’re less and less IN our lives – the real present moment.

Life is zipping by so fast at times it’s like we have to live in the future just to keep up with it all and be there when it arrives.

When we’re at work, we think about being at home.  When we’re at home, we think about our jobs.  When we’re eating dinner we’re thinking about what to order for dessert…

We skim the surface of life.

But if you’re anxious…what you need to do is live in the NOW.

You need to ask yourself one of the most important questions there is…

“Where am I?”

When you’re feeling anxious or even panicky, ask yourself where you are FOR REAL.  Not where do you THINK you may be, not what you think may happen just around the corner or in 5 seconds or 5 minutes or next week…but AT THAT MOMENT.  What’s reality? Maybe your answer will be…

“In the grocery store waiting to check out.”

“Driving home on the highway.”

“Reading another one of Rich’s genius blog posts.”

Whatever it is, it’s probably NOT going to be the same as your imaginary make-believe anxious reality.

Even if you’re not anxious, practicing and learning to pull yourself into the present moment is a great skill to learn because it’s simply more fun to live there.

Ask yourself, when have you been happiest?

Probably when you were fully PRESENT, actively involved in life.

But what do most of us do?

We escape the present to watch television…which although we think may be relaxing and how we “veg out”, tv watching is actually correlated to increased anxiety.

We answer emails on our Blackberries at our daughter’s ballet recital.

We lie on our deathbeds wondering what the hell happened…where it all went.

Where are you?

Now.

What do you see?  Who are you with?  What do you smell, touch, and feel?

This is your life.

Not the imaginary anxious thoughts running through your head.

Don’t confuse the two and for crying out loud…

Don’t sacrifice your real, wonderful  life full of love, joy, and happiness for the make believe one of doom, fear, and hopelessness.

Remember the magic question…”Where am I?”

Get in the habit of asking it.

Let me know what you think.

And if you haven’t subscribed to my new blog yet, what’re you waiting for?  That big orange button on the left side of the page is calling your name…drop you email in there and make sure you get all the free stuff I’ll be putting up!

P.S. I’ve got something BIG in the works, but I don’t know if I should start letting everyone in on it yet because it will probably be two more months still until it’s ready…what do YOU think?  Keep it to myself or spill the beans?

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Tagged as: anxiety, free anxiety help, panic attacks, phobias